Stolen Identity

The word of the LORD came to me, saying, “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart; I appointed you as a prophet to the nations.” – Jeremiah 1:4-5

As a very young child, I was taught who I was, just as you were. Life seems to mold you into an identity. Even though the identity is not 100% ours, we tend to claim it. I found that there is a theft that is stealing the truth, take a walk with me through my journey…

My first 3 memories are being molested, a big argument between my mother and grandfather, and my mother moving out of my father’s house. As a little 5 year old, the silence and confusion, taught me that it was my fault, I did something to break my family apart. I took on the identity of a pacifier.

The many years of a custody battle, molded me into who I was. Degrading comments from each of my parent’s houses towards the other parent, showed me that my feeling were wrong. Even though I loved both of my parents, hearing the other parent, that I loved very much, say such hurtful things crushed my feelings. I took on the identity of unemotional.

The years of being a pawn in the battle had taken my voice. I was silenced because it was easier to be quiet then to stir up trouble, or be in the middle. Along with developing codependency and feeling worthless.

Having a parent of a friend call me “two ton Tillie” and a close relative tell me how much I “stunk” and how “dirty” I was, as they ripped my clothes off. Causing me to develop a poor self image. I hated to look in the mirror, I didn’t like what I saw… my body or what was in it.

I left my childhood homes, with the identity of being a shy, unemotional, fat, codependent pleaser. That is who I was. I see now, how that shaped the years to follow.

I had a terrific fear of dating, because I knew that sex was all men wanted. I avoided it for the longest. Until one day, I became pregnant with my first “boyfriend” and evenly raped by him. The pregnancy was terminated because that is what he said needed to be done. When I met my ex husband, I secretly couldn’t believe that he would want to be with me, I was unworthy, fat, dirty, and plain out … junk. I did believe though, that there was some magical fairy dust that would be sprinkled over my prince charming and I and we would live happily ever after. As my co dependency arose, our relationship crumbed.

As our marriage ended, I drank a lot to find my way to an unemotional state. I had multiple affairs and gave into my curiosity with homosexuality. Even though, I was holding tight to an identify that I claimed to be mine, God started to show me differently.

A counselor told me about my codependency, I was taught how to deal with my emotions and I learnt how God sees me. How much He loves me…. Oh, how he loves me. He slowly has taking the my true identity that was stolen from me and giving it back. Removing the pieces of identity that is not true, wiping the mirror so I can see the beauty that He formed along time before I was born.

This has not been easy or fast, but I am not the same person I was before I met God. I am confident in the identity that God has given me. Connecting with my maker, has showed me that I am not a shy, unemotional, fat, codependent pleaser.

My dear friend, I pray that God will show you who you are. The true you…

God loves you so much, He create you in His perfect image.
 (Genesis 1:27 God created man in His own image, in the image of God. He created him; male and female, He created them.)
You are wonderfully, perfectly made... So what identity has been stolen from you???

I have added the Veggie Tales story, A Snoggle’s tale to this post for you to watch. God bless you.